Don’t Go Chasing Turkeys

When I was a freshman in college, I was so desperate to make friends I sat with random people in the cafeteria and tried to make small talk. It didn’t go well, as I’m sure you can imagine. I am equal parts embarrassed and proud of young me. Embarrassed because you could practically see the desperation coming off me in waves. Proud because it was a gutsy thing to do, approaching stranger after stranger. It’s also a skill that came in handy later because as a Bay Area freelance journalist, I’m forced to talk to strangers all the time. 

During my freshman year, the energy I gave off to every person I met was, “Are you my friend? Are you my friend? Are you my friend?” similar to the baby bird in P.D. Eastman’s Are You My Mother? who goes around and asks every animal if it’s its mother. The baby bird eventually found its mother but going around and asking, “Are you my friend? Are you my friend? Are you my friend?” did not win me any friends. Shocking, I know! We already understand this about friendships — how relationships are built when people are open and receptive rather than clingy and aggressive — but somehow we think the same doesn’t apply in business.

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Openness works far better than desperation. Photo by Katerina Pavlyuchkova on Unsplash

In business, we’re told it’s a numbers game and to reach out to as many people as possible. It’s tricky because on the one hand, people must know you exist. One of the biggest hurdles I face as a ghostwriter for therapists is people don’t know such a job function is out there. Whenever I tell people what I do, they ask, “What’s that?” I have to do some education, let people know I’m available. But on the other hand, no one likes a pushy salesperson.

Someone contacted me on LinkedIn multiple times pitching their offer and I very much was not interested. I didn’t seek them out, didn’t respond to their first message, and yet they contacted me again. And then again. If that works for you, great! But it doesn’t work for me. 

I notice whenever I chase people, including potential clients, they run away. But when I sit still, they approach. It reminds me of a story from my favorite spiritual teacher, Tosha Silver, who wrote about a farmer in her book It’s Not Your Money

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Stillness and receptivity work better than the chase. Photo by Vitolda Klein on Unsplash

You may even find that what you’ve been pursuing forever will begin to pursue you [once you practice detachment]. A farmer had one such wild experience. For months, she’d tried with no luck to sell the turkeys on her land, which had been a massive headache. One day someone called who wanted them all — ironically, right after she’d cleared years of junk from her home. ‘Fantastic,’ she said. ‘But now I have to catch them. What a nightmare!'”

She offered it all over [to the Divine Beloved]. Why wouldn’t God be as good with turkeys as anything else?”

And lo and behold, when she stepped outside, the turkeys began to chase her for the first time ever. Even while roaring with laughter, she quickly gathered them all.”

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Let the turkeys chase you. Photo by Mikkel Bergmann on Unsplash

This is indeed how it works! When you give everything over to the Divine with detachment, things start to happen in a way that’s the opposite of what we’re taught.”

In other words, sometimes the best thing you can do is stop chasing turkeys and let them chase you. In my work as a ghostwriter for therapists, almost all of my clients have sought me out as opposed to the other way around. It can be incredibly difficult because patience is NOT my strong suit but it’s better than acting from desperation, which never pans out. 

If you feel called to work together, I have a few slots available. Reach out to me and let’s see if we’re a good fit. 

Being an Old Soul in Business

All my life people have told me I’m an old soul, meaning someone who is wise beyond their years, highly sensitive, and empathic. I use that wisdom, sensitivity, and empathy in all my relationships, including business ones, which explains why people like working with me. And at the same time, being an old soul means I can’t conduct business in a “normal” way. (Side note, what even is normal?) It turns out, for this old soul, conventional wisdom doesn’t work.

As a ghostwriter for therapists and a content writer for small businesses, conventional wisdom says I should be out there hustling. Business coaches say, “You must get out there and sell yourself. Cold-call a hundred people a day.” Or, “For every 10 no’s you’ll receive one yes.” For some people that works. For me, that sounds like a nightmare and usually only ends in frustration. I’ve experienced this over and over again. When I reach out about ghostwriting for a therapist, more often than not, all I hear is crickets. Usually my email or telephone call goes unanswered.

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Sometimes it feels like this, that the phone has been left off the hook. Photo by Quino Al on Unsplash

The funny thing is the vast majority of my clients reached out to me, and said, “Hey, I hear you’re a ghostwriter for therapists. Can you tell me more about that?” (P.S., if you want to learn more about ghostwriting and you feel shy, check out this post.) Having someone come to me is not at all how it’s “supposed” to go!

Tosha Silver talks about this in her book It’s Not Your Money, and says, “To many people, this aggressive approach [of hustling for clients] can feel traumatic and futile. It’s just another kind of doership. Instead, you offer the project to the Divine … you say, ‘Okay, God, if You want this to happen, then open the way. Let the connections come. Let everyone who needs me, find me.’ At the right time, the splendid march of synchronicities begins.”

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Let the synchronicities commence! Photo by Billy Huynh on Unsplash

And they do. If you’re able to trust and let go, amazing things start to happen. That doesn’t mean you do nothing, rather it means you act with inspiration, from a place of intuition. The Divine could nudge you to write a blogpost where you let people know you’re a ghostwriter for therapists, or you’re a content writer for small businesses. It could also mean the Divine tells you to share on LinkedIn or Twitter that you’re available for work. Maybe the Divine Beloved will even whisper in your ear and say, “Reach out to so and so.”

The point is, there’s a difference when you act from a place of trust and intuition than your ego. The ego says, “You have to figure this all out now! You need to work harder! Achieve, achieve, achieve!” The ego has lots of ideas about how things “should” go and thinks everyone else knows better than you do. It’s why advice books are so popular. No one knows what they’re doing and in some ways it’s easier to follow in someone else’s footsteps than it is to get quiet, to be in touch with the still, inner voice that whispers suggestions.

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Your Self is whispering. Are you listening? Photo by Sai De Silva on Unsplash

Sure, advice has its place, but just because the advice is out there doesn’t mean you have to take it. Will that business coach’s advice work for you? Is it something you can sustain? What does your inner voice say?

Living in this way is different than the hyper-egoic, manifestation craze touted all over creation. Living in this way means a different sort of life. It’s easier for one, more magical for two. It’s not uncommon for opportunities to arise out of the blue, for the door you’ve been knocking on to finally open. It’s the kind of life I aspire to and it’s also why I’m here to say, “Use me. Let me be of service to you.” I’m a professional writer here to help you because I want you to succeed. Let’s go on that journey together. If you feel called, reach out to me today.